Hanna’s Story

I’m sharing Hanna’s Story, written in her own words.  She’s a teenage girl that wants to tell you her tale.    I’m so grateful for a God that continues to rescue us one by one.  – Christina

Read on…

hanna

Shared via: my name is Hanna, here is my testimony.

So, here’s to my story and starting a new place to dwell and share my thoughts on my faith, feelings, and life experiences in general. I’m Hanna, a soft spoken teenage girl with a growing love for God and a past that I’d rather talk about and accept than bottle up and keep within. I live in a small town in Texas that I just recently moved to after a pretty heart and gut wrenching event. After about a year of living in hotel to hotel with my mother & stepfather, they were arrested and my little half-sister and I were taken to live with my stepfather’s parents (nana & grandaddy). I was scared, utterly lost, and wondered what it was keeping me from my parents. (not to mention I lost ten pounds that week from stress) But I tried to stay strong for my sister and hid it all inside, hoping that if I kept it in that it would eventually disappear. This was in the summer before my freshman year of high school, a trying time in itself for someone with everything in place, let alone me. What on earth was this? I had no idea what God had to do with it, and at the time I couldn’t care less. One day that summer God blessed me with a coping tool that doubled as a talent— art. I would draw every single day, mostly singers from the 60’s that I would listen to. At the time I was not spiritually mature enough to realize that it was from above that I was given this beautiful calling, but I continued to express myself through this passion and began high school with something to preoccupy my wandering mind in the midst of a crisis. This didn’t mean everything was simple from the get-go. I fought and fought with myself; how I wasn’t happy with my skinny figure, and how people would make comments on how I needed to eat more because I was unhealthy, when really that is just how I naturally look. On the other hand, I had never been in the same church before for more than a couple of days if at all. But when I moved to this area I began going to a very small and new cowboy church in east Texas. My first thoughts were “What am I going to get out of this? I don’t fit in here”. But, as I usually did, I went through the motions. I went through the motions of bible reading, smiling, and accepting my parents’ drug use. Nothing seemed right and I always looked down on myself for being who was, and always being this unlucky being that I thought I was. Later in high school and after getting out of bad companionships, I knew what I wanted from life, and I began pulling myself out of the hole I was making a comfort zone. But, pulling myself out of the hole I was in wasn’t something I could do alone. I needed God’s guidance, but I didn’t have him in my life. So I kept on doing the same thing, pulling myself out of the hole, falling in again, out of depression, and in again I go. I stopped going to counseling and didn’t want to talk about it with my sister when she would ask “Hanna, when will we see mommy and daddy again?”because I had tears and no answers. And then something in me happened, in several different exposures to the cross I was bearing I continued to see my worth in Christ. There was never a specific song, or night where I had the epiphany, but gradually as if falling in love I knew that though I did not have my earthly parents any longer, I continually had a savior. I no longer have thoughts of suicide or harm because I know that this life of mine is no coincidence. And if you’re reading this right now and looking for a sign, I am here to say that you have a reason to be here. You and I have special purposes set by God to fulfill and build his eternal kingdom. It has been three years since I’ve seen my mother’s face, heard her laugh, gotten a hug, or an “I love you”. I love my parents very much and understand that addiction is an awful epidemic, but I pray and pray and will not give up on them. I am now going into my senior year of high school, with an optimistic mind, wonderful friends, and a loving church. I love making art, writing, and reading. Here are a few thoughts that I have learned throughout my journey thus far:

  • appreciate everyone and every little thing.
  • love and accept all, just as Christ does.
  • don’t take advantage of people or take them for granted.
  • don’t allow those who look down on/ make fun of you for being a Christan affect who you are.
  • there IS a greater plan.

Thank you for reading this, take care. x

— Hanna.

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