This is a small sample of Christina S.’s story. It’s a tale of a young girl that struggled to regain her self worth after her parent’s divorce. More than that, it’s a story of a God that loved her enough to rescue her.
Read on…
Source: Trigger: Let’s be Real
Christina S.’s Story
I was 14 when I really understood my feelings. At the time I was as happy as a 14 year old could get. I loved my school, the house we lived in, even though it was haunted. My parents were divorced but my dad and his wife and my half sister moved within a driving distance from us and I was there every weekend. My stepmom is amazing, she loved me as her own from day one and we still have that special connection. Then we moved and that is when it changed.
We moved to the next city over and I felt like my world had crumbled. I hated the school, I got bullied and battled severe depression. My mom was nowhere to be seen even though she was right there under the same rooftop as me. I was verbally abused under that rooftop by her and my brother and then I went to school to face the same demon. It followed me everywhere. I hated my life! I started hanging out with the wrong crowd who stole from stores, smoked cigarettes, had no respect for authority and I knew it all and behind closed doors I would make myself feel better by harming myself. Over the next few years my self harm got worse and when things got really bad I tried to kill myself..but I always woke up. One day I had a cry for help and brought my mom a phone book on the page that had different counselors and at the same time my jacket sleeve went up enough to see wounds and my mom got really mad made me take my jacket off and then she told me to get in the car she was taking me somewhere. She drove me to a hospital and later that evening I was placed in a mental institution place with others my age who were going through the same thing. That was it, she didn’t try to help me she dumped me off in my eyes but I guess that is how she knew to help. My mom didn’t come up there until a week or 2 later to bring me some clothes and to sit in a counseling session to see if I could go home. And I couldn’t, but about 2 weeks later I was able to.
I got home, and I got into church. I met a God who loved me and welcomed me with open arms, and while I didn’t understand why, He kept me alive all those times I tried to kill myself. I am so thankful I have such a loving God who made sure I did not die, and who loved me so much He never gave up on me! I battled such a deep depression for 4 years, and those were the longest years of my life but here I stand today, 14 years later and in a much different place. Praise the Lord! My walk with God grew so much, then it stumbled and now I am realizing again just how much He helped me and how much He deserves every ounce of my imperfect self! His love is never ending for us, he unconditionally loves you and me. We all go through tough times, that is a fact of life but how we deal with it makes or breaks us. My God delivered me from self harm, from the deep depression that I was in and molded me into what he saw I needed to be. How amazing is that?
Bullying hurts. Physical Abuse and Verbal Abuse is damaging. We need to spread love not hate. Be there for one another, stand up to the abuser and the bullies and let them know it is not ok! Help them help themselves because we know they do that because they themselves are hurting inside and it has nothing to do with the receiver. Stand together. Stay strong for yourself and for your neighbor. We are all worth so much more than we believe to be. Don’t let the devil steal your joy or your life. You are worth it!
For his anger endureth but a moment; in his favour is life: weeping may endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning. – Psalm 30:5
For I the LORD thy God will hold thy right hand, saying unto thee, Fear not; I will help thee. – Isaiah 41:13
Read more from Christina S. here: https://herroar.com/author/carlydean/
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